Fathers Know Best, or Something

It was just a couple years ago that (now-closed) Privé named Kevin Federline Father of the Year. That was back in 2008–countless cases of Marlboros, several pounds and a lifetime of regret ago.

Instead of cashing in and hosting a Father’s Day party at a B-grade club, K-Fed settled for Father’s Day dinner at Union this year, where there was nary a token prize, comped bottle service or child of his in sight.

Meanwhile, Anna Nicole Smith’s baby daddy and Details’ co-Father of the Year 2007 honoree Larry Birkhead was in Las Vegas over F-Day weekend, too. Where was Dannielynn’s dad spotted, you ask? Checking out Holly Madison’s ta-tas in Peepshow, of course! His one-time Playmate of the Year and gold-digger of a baby momma may be dead, but his love for big fake boobies lives on.

In Birkhead’s defense, breasts are fun to look at. And at least he had the good parenting sense to not bring his daughter to the show. Still, we’ve seen more stable-looking role model material in The Temple of Doom.