Compiled by @marseniuk
@TFLN (917): I think I am going to devote my summer to making my cats Internet celebrities.
@Lauren_MacD Just because you can talk on your phone on the bus doesn’t mean you should.
@ScottAukerman The last time the entire world watched something this boring, Avatar grossed $1.8 billion.
@ItsChelseaStaub You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
@mattfraction “AT&T covers 94% of all Americans?” That’s amazing. I know THE ENTIRE OTHER SIX PERCENT.
@blakeshelton Grown men should never order drinks at Starbucks that consist of more than one word.
@natevegas $35 for 3 burger combos! Food was good, but, um, yeah. They’re burgers. (@Fuddruckers)
@TheFunnyJosh I love listening to FM radio; it gives me an opportunity to catch up with popular, modern commercials, with limited music breaks!
@joncrowley Apparently Spain’s number one export is pretend injuries.
@djshiftlv Ladies, just ‘cause it’s summer doesn’t mean the no-bra look is OK for all of you. #gravity
@TwentyLbPizza Lotta people talk shit about Vegas. But I’m glad I grew up here, as odd as that sounds. 24 hour kid in a 24 hour city!
@ConanOBrien Congratulations to Spain on their World Cup victory! May the streets run red with blood orange sangria and ham!
@LatoyaBembry I think I’m finally starting to like this Gaga chick.