Tweets of the Week

Compiled by @marseniuk

@Jesus_M_Christ Scarlett Johansson is single again? Well happy early birthday to me!

@anura “If you want Wikileaks to shut down, ask Yahoo to buy it.”

@PhutureLaFait Growing up there was always a dude who u just knew was gay but he wasn’t “out.” Well, he’s on FB now and u were right about him.

@kdn13 What have the holidays done? Can’t stop thinking about Christmas trees, sequined dresses, and my future bridal registry. Still single, boys!

@jordanrubin My ancestors never had a family crest, because there’s no way to draw worrying, nagging, complaining and gassy.

@capricecrane Santa is “gonna find out who’s naughty or nice?” Who does he think he is, my gynecologist?

@PimpBillClinton #2010disappointments though we made many advancements in society, sadly, pimpin’ STILL isn’t easy. 🙁

@getoffendedcom Convincing ur kids Santa @ the mall is real is pointless when he smells of vodka & hits on his elf every 5 min. I need to find a new mall.

@EdgarGallardo I wonder if the teller at #WellsFargo will go out with me knowing how broke I am…

@thevegasjunebug He sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake? STALKER!

@xo_shallen New Years resolution: become a lesbian. I’m having no luck with guys it seems.

@SchwartzNpwr U know ur in trouble when u get smacked on the tush Xmas Eve and it doesn’t stop shaking till New Years!

@FNFGaryJ Don’t believe In New Years resolution. I’ll change when I want.

Suggested Next Read

Virginia Valentine

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Virginia Valentine

By Sean DeFrank

As Clark County manager, Virginia Valentine is charged with ensuring that some 2 million residents receive vital services such as fire protection, parks and child welfare. Her job also includes managing a $5.9 billion budget. Being an engineer, and a natural problem solver, gave Valentine the skills to do the job. The Florida native has been a Valley resident for almost 30 years. Before attaining the top spot in the county, she was assistant county manager from 2002 to 2006. Her time at the county was preceded by a four-year stint as Las Vegas city manager.