Ashley Greene drags Joe Jonas to a twee Candy Land party

Imagine, for a moment, you’re a precocious teenage girl. This will be easier if you’re one of our less savory readers with proclivities we’d rather not hear about.

But what could possibly be more in your wheelhouse of things you obsessed about over the last three years than Twilight, the Jonas Brothers or candy? Nothing. The answer is “nothing.” (Except for those newly mourned Bieber bangs.)

Ashley Greene (yes, we know, it’s not the same as if it was Kristen Stewart in this scenario, but roll with us) was at Pure for her 24th birthday, bringing boyfriend Joe Jonas for her Candy Land-themed party. The VIP area was done up with copies of the game, giant lollipops and a cake topped by King Kandy’s kastle (ahem: castle). Greene said she loved the game because it’s “fun and girly.” It’s also for children who can’t read or count, but, you know … To-may-to, to-mah-to. Jonas has spent basically his entire life surrounded by Disney-addled children, and that party had to be way too immature even for him.

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