The Gas Man Cometh

Hey there, environmental do-gooders, do you remember the sweet soulful days of $4-a-gallon gas and happy-hippie talk of grass ethanol, electric engines and light rail? Seems a long time ago, doesn’t it? Go ahead and sing along, you nostalgic leaf-eating, Canada-loving, Bryan Adams fans.

I got my first real hybrid

Bought it in the Silver State

Drove it all across the desert

It was the summer of 2008.

Then OPEC took pity on us all, crude oil prices went down and we got back to mocking global warming for the hoax it was.

But some guys just can’t let go, and just in time for the next wave of 60-buck-fillerups, one of them is coming here to share his namby-pamby green ideas about how we can be more like the Maoists. The famed New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman, author of Hot, Flat, and Crowded: Why We Need a Green Revolution—And How It Can Renew America and other tools of liberal internationalist indoctrination, will be appearing at UNLV at 7:30 p.m. March 28. Tickets are free and available at the university’s Performing Arts Center box office beginning at 10 a.m. March 12.

It’s troubling to know that our tax dollars are flowing to an institution that shills for the cause of green socialism. But don’t worry—that’s one spigot we’ll be shutting off soon.

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By Marvin Lucas

@TRENDYBLACKGUY Success is my job. Pissing people off is a side hobby. @2girlsandpoodle Hey right on! Charlie Sheen’s a warlock. That’s awesome. How brave of him to go public. This changes everything. #what.