Longoria brings the new boyfriend around to her club

Eva Longoria named her club for herself and she named her perfume for herself. She even had a personalized cocktail, “The Sparkling Eva,” at her 36th birthday party March 18 at Eve. The tallest monument to all things Eva, though, came in cake form.

Longoria landed a 3-and-a-half footer for the party—and she’s not much taller than 5 feet. Which means the cake was, like, 70 percent the size of Longoria. We’re not sure if she was supposed to eat it or jump out of it.

She was at the party with new boyfriend Eduardo Cruz, brother to Penelope Cruz and, one would presume, a source of maddening rage to Tony Parker. Also there to celebrate were Mario Lopez and Courtney Mazza, David Spade, Kevin Farley, Anthony Cools, Nathan Burton, the JabbaWockeeZ and Josh Strickland.

Longoria and Cruz followed up the party with a trip to see O and have dinner at the Sugar Factory, where she was presented with another cake. Now you know what to ask for when it comes time for your birthday—enough cake that it could stand toe-to-toe with Andre the Giant.

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