Building a Laugh

Former sitcom star Tim Allen still has a few jokes in his tool belt

It started off badly. Opening with a bit about household caulk with lines such as, “Women always want new caulk.” Get it? Because it sounds like cock!

Then it got worse. Of shooting his grandmother in the leg with a BB gun, “She thought it was chiggers. Of course, nowadays you have to say chegros.” Really? That’s just lazy.

Known by many as Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor from Home Improvement, Tim Allen took awhile to find his groove on April 2, but when he did, he put on a pretty decent show. Standing stationary and leaving the mic in the stand for the entire hour, he discussed everything from the dangerous toys he used to have as a child to his love of farts (he’s put a lot of thought into just how much he loves them) to religion. This is a man who studied philosophy in college and when he wanted to, came off as quite intelligent. In fact, his funniest stuff was his smartest. On why he fears the diminutive Tom Cruise: because he’s a Scientologist and “could he turn my urine into maple syrup.” His observational work was also a highlight. When discussing his problems with the movie The Hulk: “He turns green and like 19 times his normal size. His shirt rips right off, but his pants still fit?!”

With all the money and fame he has, hopefully Allen will take the risk and focus more on what he did best on this night: thought-provoking, off-beat humor.


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Don Rickles


Don Rickles

By Jason Harris

On March 20, the “Merchant of Venom,” Don Rickles, spit his fire at The Orleans Showroom audience, and they were delighted. While age (84) might have slowed him down physically, Rickles is still sharp and full of piss and vinegar. A Las Vegas headliner for 52 years, he still bobs and weaves across the stage energetically, although he does use his deteriorating physical condition to garner laughs. For example, he repeatedly dropped the microphone, and then stared down his orchestra’s bandleader, demanding he pick it up.