Midsummer a blowout blowout

A concept that shockingly hasn’t caught on elsewhere—putting girls in lingerie and letting them prance around the pool on a summer night—had its annual bow at the Palms Pool & Bungalows. The Playboy-affiliated Midsummer Night’s Dream party was Aug. 13, with a tricked-out DJ booth manned by Jersey Shore’s Paul “Pauly D” DelVecchio.

DelVecchio, who just started touring with Britney Spears, talked about getting a little bump and grind from Spears.

“Britney Spears put me onstage and gave me a lap dance. Who can say that—that Britney Spears gave them a lap dance in front of 20,000 people?” DelVecchio said. “Best night of my life.”

To be fair, when the majority of the rest of your nights involve trying to stop Deena Cortese from viciously mauling your junk, there’s really nowhere else to go but up.

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Frozen nipples all in a day’s work for Ron Artest


Frozen nipples all in a day’s work for Ron Artest

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“Eccentric” and “crazy” don’t really do Ron Artest justice. “Artestian” is the only adjective that fits anymore. At his best, the L.A. Laker comes off like the Wu-Tang Clan’s Ol’ Dirty Bastard—a willful buffoon whose country-dumb act is an attention-grabbing smokescreen for cleverness. At his worst, he seems like a multiple-concussion victim raised on a steady diet of lead paint chips.