Titanic 3D

(PG-13) ★★★★☆

The ship so nice they sank it twice, only this time, with a 3-D up-charge. James Cameron’s 1997 film returns for the 100th anniversary of the doomed vessel’s 1912 voyage. The 3-D is pretty good, but still a straight-up postproduction conversion job. Eh. But Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet are back (ah, so young) with all their eye-roll-worthy dialogue. At least Cameron is a genius at instilling narrative dread and providing incredible cinematic images. The show will, you know, go on.

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Franchise Fail

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Franchise Fail

By Michael Phillips, Tribune Media Services

Sweeping aside the film’s weirdest unasked question—who goes to their 13th high school reunion?—the characters created by Adam Herz for the 1999 hit American Pie return for a rather tired sequel called American Reunion, in which poor, desperate Jim Levenstein’s genitals once again get their ears boxed (metaphorically speaking), and Stifler’s way with nubile 17-year-olds doesn’t seem quite as obnoxiously sprightly as it once did, given that Stifler is now supposed to be in his early 30s and the actor, Seann William Scott, is 35.

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