I Pronounce Thee


I don’t have a good way of explaining what makes Pronunciation Manual, a YouTube-based parody of the sexless and robotic pronunciation guides that afflict our online dictionaries, funny or useful in the slightest—other than to say “ty-wy-woo-ley-guh-hoodey.” According to the manual, that’s how you pronounce “twilight.” “Arianna Huffington” is “Nardo Fa-fa-fa-fa-fafa-fa.” “Schadenfreude” is “skooden frooty,” naturally. And the manual isn’t ashamed to tell you when it’s not sure about the correct way to say something, like “armoire.” (“You serious? Of course I know what it is. It’s a wood box for French people’s clothes—a mwah-mwah.”) Nor is it shy about expressing “conch” as a series of phlegmy sounds, bleating out “fax piss” for “faux pax,” or pronouncing “Gangnam Style” as “goozen doozen” only after a long, resigned sigh.

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Ups and Downs


By Mike Grimala

It looked like UNLV was in serious trouble on Tuesday night. Playing at Portland without one of the their best players, injured junior Mike Moser, the Rebels struggled through the first 20 minutes and it appeared as though they might actually lose to a Pilots team that entered the game with a 3-4 record. But thanks to a spirited performance from a pair of backcourt stalwarts, along with a frontcourt fill-in, UNLV rallied to secure a hard-fought road win.