BLOOD ON THE FLATTOP: Psychobilly outfit Tiger Army plays the House of Blues on March 30, with Hillbilly Casino and the very fine Dale Watson sharing the bill ($37). I presume this is related to the Viva Las Vegas Rockabilly Weekender, a weekend-long celebration of all the Bettie Page-looking girls who are too cool to talk to me. I haven’t seen or heard Tiger Army, but I like them for two reasons: There’s a guy in the band named Geoff who plays the upright bass—the exact instrument I would play if I were in a rockbilly band, and could actually play an instrument—and their fan base probably includes copious numbers of those Bettie Page-looking girls. Will any of them talk to me if I go to the show? No, they will not. But I could discover a great psychobilly trio, and Watson always puts on a fine show. (All right, fine. I dated a rockabilly girl once. And I may still have some issues, OK?)
THE HATER IN ME: Sometimes I hate you, Las Vegas. It’s nothing against your character, nor is it your continued insistence in putting boobies on everything. And I certainly don’t subscribe to that whole “no one good ever plays here” thing; I have seen so many great musical artists on Las Vegas stages that I’ve actually become fairly blasé about going to shows. (You say that the ghost of Freddie Mercury is playing the Chelsea? Sure, if it doesn’t start too late on a work night.) But there’s one area where Las Vegas continually fails me—and that’s in the consistency of its concert bookings. There are weeks where there are simply no good national touring shows coming through town at all. And that’s why I’m sitting here, stymied, telling you to go see one of Shania Twain’s four residency shows at Caesars Palace this coming week ($55-$250). She probably puts on a fine show for all I know, but I ain’t gonna find that out this week because I’m cranky.
NOW ON SALE: On April 10, the Cosmopolitan will receive Tegan and Sara, one of several Coachella headliners playing Vegas shows on their way to the festival ($30). It’s safe to assume that the coolest sister act in indie rock will play songs from their newish album Heartthrob, and will probably marvel over how much more awesome Vegas is than Indio, California.