Trump Parties for His Birthday, Like He Heard Poor People Do

donaldtrumpandoliviaculpoontheredcarpetattheact.jpegMiss USA wrapped up at Planet Hollywood on June 16 with a wonderful bit of pageant schadenfreude coming from the stumbling logorrhea of Miss Utah Marissa Powell when confronted with a softball question about equal pay for women.

It’s kind of delightful to watch a beautiful girl reduced to a quivering, flailing collection of half-matched verbs and unrelated nouns, kind of the way, say, for example, a 13-year-old boy would act around a beautiful girl such as Hannah Richardson in Mr. Walter’s fourth-period math class before everyone who heard him awkwardly ask her out started laughing at him because kids are cruel and we’re just throwing this out there as a hypothetical. It’s not a thing that actually happened in the early ’90s, and we have no idea why you’d even read into that.
But before Miss Connecticut Erin Brady captured the tiara for the 2013 competition, pageant owner and human Brookstone store Donald Trump was at The Act on June 15 to celebrate both Nana Meriwether’s last night as the reigning Miss USA as well as his 67th birthday, which was June 14.

Trump also brought Miss Universe Olivia Culpo, former Miss Alabama Katherine Webb and another 50 or so friends to celebrate. Ain’t no party like a D. Trump party, cuz a D. Trump party don’t stop until it’s time to pretend to mount another presidential campaign in a ploy to drive up ratings for your goofy reality show.

Meanwhile, the Jonas Brothers, who performed at the pageant, were spotted filming their new music video at Planet Hollywood, as they try to Timberlake their career arc. Nick co-hosted the pageant with Giuliana Rancic, while Joe partied after the show with Wilmer Valderrama at Hakkasan.

Abraham Continues Quest for Attention With Bikini-Clad Appearance

Do we have to go through all the formalities, or can we just go ahead and crown Farrah Abraham America’s Next Top Hot Mess?

The 22-year-old was at Sapphire Pool on June 15 to show off the new boobs she just purchased June 2. Making this her second augmentation, and first since barely crossing the FDA’s legal threshold to go to silicone from saline. They grow up so fast.

Ignoring the fact that Abraham rose to whatever kind of national prominence she has by appearing on MTV’s Teen Mom, she’s really breaking into the full-court press, with her recent sex tape (Backdoor Teen Mom, for maximum classiness) and the spate of surgeries and her upcoming gig on August 20 at Crazy Horse III hosting for the Gentleman’s Club Owners Expo & Tradeshow. We feel like she and Courtney Stodden could really go head-to-head as the Britney and Christina of the 2010s.

Another One for the Road

Kendra Wilkinson-Baskett celebrated her 28th birthday at Chateau on June 15. Remember when Kendra was just another fresh-faced girl in a weird four-way relationship with Hugh Hefner? Farrah Abraham makes that seem so quaint. … Ian Ziering, who’s currently appearing in Chippendales, brought his wife, Erin, and daughters Mia and Penna to check out the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus at Thomas & Mack Center for Father’s Day on June 16, and we really hope this means his next stop on his Weird, Post-90210 Performances Tour will be as an overly buff clown. … Carmelo Anthony also did his Father’s Day here, hitting up Exotics Racing with his wife, La La, son Kiyan and father-in-law where he drove a Ferrari 458 Italia and Corvette Z06, presumably cackling all the while at the idea of the Spurs bouncing LeBron James out of the NBA Finals with a series of lopsided victories.


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