Joanna Angel & The Gigolos’ “Fish Food”

There is, apparently, a Jaws-esque porno called Sharkbait. What specific fetish that caters to, we’re pretty sure we don’t want to know. (Puncture- wound enthusiasts? Ichthyophiliacs?) But in any case, it gave porn star Joanna Angel a chance to showcase her musical chops with “Fish Food,” a bouncy, beach-blanket (PG-rated) surf jam that we suppose makes Angel the Ann-Margret of pornography. (Angel’s version of Kitten With a Whip would be radically different.)

As to the video, oh, let’s go with “charmingly inept.” The production quality might make most porn shoots look like Terrence Malick masterworks, but the vibe is straight up friends-screwing-around-for-the-camera.

Angel cavorts poolside, dancing the swim while delivering such lines as If he hasn’t noticed yet, I’m gonna get myself wet … in the pool, of course. The Gigolos—Small Hands, Chris Lewis, Nikki Hearts, Wolf Hudson and former Awolnation drummer Hayden Scott disturbingly prancing around in red tighties—play beach-bum backup.

But the star of the show is unequivocally the half-deflated rubber shark setting up shop on the pool’s diving board. That is a shark we could party with. “Yo, what up half-deflated rubber shark?” “Nothin, brah. Just chillin’.” “You need a beer?” “Oh, for sure, dog. Wait, no. Get me a chelada instead.” “Red beer? Oh, that’s classic you, half-deflated rubber shark.”

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