While people are watching Paul Blart Mall Cop 2, we can board spaceships and start a new world, one we can be proud to leave our children.
— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) April 18, 2015
I’m gonna wait for Paul Blart 3.
— Albert Brooks (@AlbertBrooks) April 18, 2015
I hope the crashed Star Destroyer in the #StarWars trailer has been converted into live/work artist’s lofts & a food co-op.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 17, 2015
You know what I hate? Oh, wait. This is twitter. Only 140 characters. Let me start again. You know what I like?
— Dino Stamatopoulos (@DinosThirdTwitt) April 18, 2015
Jarrett Stoll was arrested in Las Vegas on cocaine & ecstasy charges–or in other words for being a hockey player on vacation in Las Vegas
— Nils Parker (@NilsAParker) April 18, 2015
You mock Paul Blart like he’s not one of our better cops.
— Mark Agee (@MarkAgee) April 18, 2015
There will be no adjustment to the #Browns win total, conference futures, or Superbowl odds simply by changing jerseys. Good try Cleveland
— Todd Fuhrman (@ToddFuhrman) April 15, 2015
Even though they’re out of the playoffs, it sounds like Jarret Stoll is still playing *sunglasses* the possession game.
— Wil Wheaton (@wilw) April 18, 2015
RIP Betty Willis. We all feel a lot more “welcome” in Las Vegas because of you! http://t.co/z3H2yKjlPU
— Mike Attisano (@simplifyinglv) April 21, 2015