Topless Tariffs

Photo by Jon Estrada

Photo by Jon Estrada

Jubilee! closed last week. It was the last of its kind, as we were told many times in the media coverage leading up to the final performance, but also significant is that another topless show has left the market. Vegas veterans will remember a time when there were really only three types of shows in town—headliners, production shows and lounge acts. Peeling the lounges off into a category of their own leaves headliners and production shows, and the latter almost always had a topless element, making up close to 50 percent of show options.

Times have changed. Today there are only six casino shows that can be categorized as bona fide topless, a scant 6 percent of the market. Add in the almost-topless crop, and the number rises to 12 percent.

I had to use a crib to decipher which shows fit the almost-topless criterion, which I got in the form of Arnold Snyder, who maintains the website Snyder points out that, contrary to what their marketing campaigns portray, Pin Up (Stratosphere), Zombie Burlesque (Saxe Theater), Sin City Comedy & Burlesque (Planet Hollywood) and Absinthe (Caesars Palace) are not topless. And while there are some topless moments in Zumanity (New York-New York), they’re brief, so I also put Zumanity in this category.

That leaves elder statesman Crazy Girls (Planet Hollywood), Fantasy (Luxor), Sexxy (Westgate), X Burlesque (Flamingo), X Rocks (Rio) and the new X Country (Harrah’s) as Las Vegas’ only remaining true topless productions.

So where’s the deal? After opening well below the market, Sexxy raised its ticket price to $53.46. X Country and X Rocks are both $63.61, Crazy Girls is $66.31 and X Burlesque is $78.22. The current best deal is Fantasy, at $48.51 for the lowest-tier.

All of these can be purchased at discounts, too. On a recent check at Tix4Tonight, Sexxy becomes the least expensive at $37 after all taxes and fees. If you don’t want to deal with traveling to the booths, you can also find discounts via online codes and in ads that appear in the freebie mags. Bottom line, these are among the lowest-priced shows in town.

Of course, if we’re talking topless, we have to consider the guys. Of the three hunk shows in town, the best deal is Aussie Hunks at Planet Hollywood, at $61.98. Next is Chippendales at the Rio for $66.31, then Thunder From Down Under at Excalibur for $76.78. These shows, too, are discounted at Tix4Tonight, though only from 30-47 percent. That 47 percent discount is for Aussie Hunks, making it the best value when it comes to the boys.

Anthony Curtis is the publisher of the Las Vegas Advisor and