Vegas Seven

Comrade Grumpy

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Peeve of the Week: Relentless Documentarians

    Got a social function to get to? Begin at “fashionably late” and tack on an hour. That crucial 60 minutes that used to be reserved for self-medication—when you weren’t expected to manage more than a few grunts of small talk—has been obliterated. Now? That first hour is strictly for the picture rodeo.

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Peeve of the Week: The Taxicab Illuminati

    I have complained about the quality of taxi service in this town before, and I know I’m far from the only one. But at this moment—after having waited an hour for a cab that never showed up—I feel a particularly incandescent dislike of Las Vegas’ cabs, and I’ve got to preach it.

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Peeve of the Week: Hypocritical Dress Codes

    A few weeks ago, I tried getting into Inspire Theater but was turned away. I was wearing a button-down shirt, a pair of slim jeans, casual sneakers and—gasp—a baseball cap. Women didn’t clutch their purse and run to the other side of the road. Children didn’t call me a monster and run away from me. Police didn’t cite me for any sort of crime.

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Comrade Grumpy Would Like You to See a Movie Once in a While

    There you are in the middle of a perfectly serviceable conversation on the relative merits of Captain McLuskey’s law enforcement techniques when some bore sweeps the leg out from under you with a well-timed “I haven’t seen The Godfather!”

  • Comrade Grumpy

    LinkedIn Used to Mean How You Were Kept in Siberian Prison

    Got another email the other day from LinkedIn, this one encouraging me to “check out so-and-so’s new skill.” So-and-so is a coworker and also a longtime friend. I called him over to cialis 20mg online my desk, showed him the email, asked him about this alleged new skill (“digital media,” whatever the hell that is) […]

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Downtown’s March of Hipsterism as Inevitable as Five-Year Plan

    When they came for the old Fremont Street motels, I said, “Well, they were old and kind of ratty, anyway.” When they began opening up bars that served Strip-priced cocktails, I said, “I guess it’s nice to have options.”

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Comrade Grumpy’s Peeve of the Week: Free Refills

    I recently went out to lunch with a water-smart friend. This friend had in front of him two glasses, both of which he had emptied.

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Dressing (Way) Down

    I know lazy. Believe me, I really know lazy. So much so that if lazy were a career, Warren Buffett would be my butler.

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Outdoor Mania

    So, our weather is finally turning from miserable to bearable, which means I need to drop everything, squeeze into a pair of bicycle shorts, lace up my cross-trainers and bolt out the front door to soak up some of Mother Nature’s finest. At least that’s what the fine folks at this magazine are imploring me to do in this week’s issue.

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Highs and Lows from the UNR game

    High: Members of the ZBT fraternity selling red clown noses outside the Thomas & Mack Center to benefit the Children’s Miracle Network. Low: The pile of schlock advertising fliers on every seat before the game. Spare the mess and save a tree. High: One of the fliers is a Christmas tree coupon. Hey, thanks! High: The sold-out student section singing in unison to the UNLV fight song.

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Highs and Lows from the GCU game

    High: Justin Hawkins mistaking himself for Rebel legend Fearless Freddie Banks and scoring 25 points to lead UNLV. Low: The shot that the real Fearless Freddie (UNLV 1983-87) took in the Legends (a.k.a. old-timers) game at halftime. Let’s just pretend that didn’t happen. Low: The moment in the first half when it sounded like the Rebels were playing in a high school gym. In Phoenix.

  • Comrade Grumpy

    Water-Wimp Associations

    It’s not the recent rainy weather that has me depressed; it’s the deluge of idiocy in the wake of the storms. Here is the Mojave Desert’s most predictable weather pattern: It rains; I scramble to shut off my water-timer; I feel good about myself for saving money and water; I witness the sprinkler systems running full blast all along my community’s common areas; I want to cry.

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